Dude, that’s my property
Dude! This morning is (in high falsetto voice) RAWKIN’. Even the words do what I say. So I’m walking on sunshine to the post office in my brand new, bitchin’ turquoise Vans when I spot my inner monologue on display–poster format.
The first ever word I learned was shishkabob (not even an English word but nonetheless a tasty word). But the second word I learned was dude.
I was “The Dude” way before the Cohen brothers’ Big Lebowski, way before you were outshined, looking Minnesota and feeling California, way before anyone stole your car and way, way before the Bud Light dude. So before you say anything, let me tell you: Your mom taught me dude.
And now the USPS is dropping dude bombs. Yes!!!
I actually like the post office and I prefer it to FedEx and UPS. I use it every day and Scott at the counter is always helpful even though he can’t hear a word I say.
I’m so happy to know that the world is finally coming around to my way of thinking.
So before you say, “Oh GOD,” The Chingon will do.
Tags: Big Lebowski, Dude, Fed Ex, Katrina and the Waves, Oh my God, Outshines, Soundgarden, The Dude, UPS, USPS, walking on sunshine
May 15th, 2008 at 12:15 pm
You have no idea how big my smile is! This of course is for two Ursa major reasons and one Ursa minor reason. 1) Hello! I scouted the turq Vans and rock them just about every day with a disgusting amount of respect for color coordinachingon. B) My Pops is gonna love this. “Dude” is the first word out of his mouth when I bring you up. Finally 3) My guy Earl at the PO near me is Super helpful and thoughtful. And he can hear me, but Scott and his binder is helpful, too.
May 15th, 2008 at 1:53 pm
i got one in my trunk…not a dude. a tub.
May 15th, 2008 at 2:05 pm
@ zaphod. how many people can you fit in your trunk?
May 15th, 2008 at 2:27 pm
Until this moment, I never really thought about the tubs.
Now I MUST HAVE THEM!
Dude, I gotta get me a couple of them tubs.
Just think of the uses. The will be the duct tape of mass storage recepticles.
A home lonely single socks, the additional litter box, porn stash…..
May 15th, 2008 at 2:35 pm
in perusing your prose Senor Chingon, you strike me as more of a “buddy” or “pal” type of guy than a “dude” guy…